“I charge you to write…”

My friend, Mindi, has “suggested” (see title) that I write down some of my thoughts, on the Mystery of prayer. Here goes…

I won’t tackle the “why“, or “how“, of prayer.  The “what” is easy…pray for everything; all that prompts the heart to be concerned, the mind to contemplate need, and the soul to praise, for what it rejoices in. The “who“…to God; for others, and ourselves, while giving him thanks. The “where“…everywhere. It is, the “when,” of prayer, that I spoke of with friends today; specifically: “Why does God, take so long, to answer, our prayers?”

I wonder at God’s timetable.  I’ve asked the question: “Why did you put this matter/longing/person, on my heart, Lord, if you’re not going to do something about it…NOW?” It occurs to me, then, to look at biblical scripture.  There, I see that prayer isn’t just something to say TO God, like I might ask for a glass of water; or to fire off AT God, as I might send an e-mail to someone, figuring that they’ll hit the Reply button, with their answer, in a couple of hours, or perhaps a day, or two.
As it is portrayed in the Bible, prayer, seems to be a sustained dialogue, between ourselves and God; dialogue that seems one-sided, if defined by a, statement-(or question)-response, format.  God’s part, in the conversation being, often, a non-verbal, sense-of-presence.  A conversation that often takes time. Years, as in the case of the childless, Hanna.  Decades, as in the case of the childless, Sarai and Abram; and for the devout Simeon, who longed to see the Messiah, before his death.  Even generations, as was the case, with the enslaved Israelites, in Egypt. Prayer, seems to be a conversation, that is at the foundation, of faith, in God. His desire for us, awakening our need for him as, provider, healer, deliverer, friend, and lover. A conversation, that over time, becomes for us, wordless, a rumination of the heart, going on, in the background, of everyday life. God’s answer, when it comes, more a response to our wondering soul, or the cry of our heart, than a request, from our lips.

God’s timing, in answering us, can, I believe, only be understood, in retrospect, if at all.  We may not be clued into, why God is: “taking so long,” but we can understand, sometimes, why he: “took so long.” 

I have a friend, whose husband, was unemployed for several years; who eventually not only found a job, but one that is ideally suited to him, one in which, he feels fulfilled.  It would seem, that the time it took, for God, to answer my friend’s prayers, was spent, in God, preparing a place, for her husband, to work; allowing my friends, at the same time, to learn a deep dependence, on their Heavenly Father, strengthening their relationship, with him.

An example from my own life, on the power of sustained prayer, would be, in God’s answer to me, concerning my desire, for a wife.  God, after close to thirty years of prayer, on the matter, has answered: “No.”  In retrospect, I believe he tried to tell me this 10 years ago, again 5 years ago, and again 2 years ago, but I couldn’t, or wouldn’t, hear the denial, of what I wanted, so deeply.  It is only through a series of events, in this last year, that I finally heard, and accepted the answer.  Though, in saying no, God did offer me something else, special intimacy, with himself.  God has, offered himself, as my mate, if I would have him, and I have said, yes.  After decades, God did answer me, it wasn’t the answer, I wanted.  I wish I could say, that I’m ecstatically happy; that Jesus is now, all I’ll ever want, or need, in a mate, but I can’t, not yet.  I still want, what God has denied me.  What I am excited about, is how he will reveal himself to me, over time.  I am, giving myself over, to a sense of wonder; to a sense of awe, and expectation, for our relationship.  I see, that God spent the last 20 years, and more, fashioning within me, a special place, for himself.

God doesn’t always answer quickly, or as we would like, it is true.  He will answer, though; and when he does, it will be with a measure, of grace.